PTSD??

It’s been a less-than-exciting 2-3 weeks. Every day is a brand new experience. As I've mentioned, one can have no expectations.

Almost 3 weeks ago now I put Richard in adult day care for his own safety. He’s had a heat stroke two years in a row and I’m just not in the mood to go through that again. I told him this was his job and he sort of accepted that. The first evening he told me he didn’t want to go back and I told him we’d talk about it and he went out the back door for a “walk” When he wasn’t home by 9:30 and it was also dark-thirty I got anxious and called 911 and 4 police cars, the police helicopter, some friends, and our daughters were all driving around looking for him. Finally at 10:34 he walked around the corner and strolled on home wondering what all the fuss was about. Of course he couldn’t tell us where he’d been and no one could believe that he hadn’t been spotted by somebody! The police ask me if I was going to make him go back to the center and I said you betcha I am. I felt like I had no choice. Course I did but the choice was leaving him home alone no fluids, not eating and getting sick and I couldn’t do that.

As you can imagine, the rest of that week and the next were pretty terrible but at least he didn’t walk off again. He’s now beginning to enjoy it just a little bit and it’s doing some good for him. He’s communicating better and talking a little bit better and he seems to be calming down some. He gets very agitated—part of the disease. He told me there were 3 women that wanted him.
My blood pressure has gone down since I’m not worried about him all day. His blood pressure is perfect but he has no stress.

That evening I was very stressed and Kacie said call your mother so I did and of course the minute she said hello I burst into tears. Partly from worry and partly from sheer frustration, I felt like I’d been trampled by a herd of buffalo. Anyhow, Carter, my 28 month grandson, heard me crying and was alarmed. He brought me a ball of yarn and said “ball” when he gave it to me, went over and scooped up my current project (which he’d pulled the needles out of earlier) and brought it over and carefully set it in my lap, then went back and brought my pattern to me. Oh and I got a hug and kiss too. I thought that was pretty perceptive for a 2-year-old to recognize that my knitting makes me feel good.

So it’s been a difficult 2-3 weeks but he’s doing much better and seems rather resigned. He really needs to be a bit worse to be content, as it is he kind of knows he really doesn’t belong there but…..there is no alternative.

OTN: Stranded socks, Advent Calendar Scarf